Barbaric mother

Me: "I've sent off for the tickets for your jazz concert so you'll have to play in it"

Ethan: "What if I crack my head open?"

Me:"Then we'll get it sewn up."

Ethan:"What if the operation is on the same day."

Me:"They won't operate on a Saturday. And anyway if you have blood pouring out of your head during the concert, the jazz people won't mind. It'll be something to add interest."

Ethan:"My mum's barbaric."