Tea anyone?

Tonight I came home, exited the car, locked it with the remote and walked through the garden towards the house.

No sooner had I gone in through the door when the car alarm went off.

Not wanting to annoy our lovely neighbours, I used the remote to try and unlock or lock the car; anything to tell the car it wasn't being stolen.

Nothing worked.

I couldn't unlock the car to get in using the remote and the alarm was being very persistent and loud.

I realised that I would need to unlock the car manually, which is a bit of a challenge with these new-fangled keys. I started to take the key apart to remove the metal key bit. I mistakenly removed a silver bit of trim from the wrong side of the key. (I blame the blind panic that a car alarm induces.)

Eventually I removed the key cover and the key. I put the metal bit in the lock and levered it using the key fob to unlock the car successfully.

The alarm continued together with the hazard lights flashing and the headlights on.

Dave out of the house to come to my rescue with the spare key. That proved useless.

Dave bravely continued despite a migraine which must have been excruciating with an alarm overdose. He got the handbook out which proved next to useless although it showed me how to change the alarm settings, all of which I'm sure works fine if the car isn't having a hissy fit.

After what seemed an eternity the alarm stopped. We opened the car up and turned the headlights from automatic to off. The hazard lights seemed unresponsive to efforts to switch them off. The car locks also seemed to be ignoring our entreaties.

So my car is unlocked with the hazards flashing and will be recovered by the lovely people at the AA who know me so well now that they'll be inviting me round for tea.