Friday, 22 December 2006

Barking Bonkers

Well I've done it. I've been thinking about it for a while. Last time I did it was when we were living in the States. Money wasn't a problem then. Money isn't really a problem now. I think having one of those damn offset mortgages just makes you think twice before splashing out.

So I've splashed a wad on annual gym membership and persuaded Mel to do the same. It pays for itself if we go about one and a half times a week unless you consider the time value of money in which case we'd have to go a bit more frequently. I failed accountancy courses so I won't be considering the time value of money.

So we're signed up to Grottsville gym. It is very skanky but it's cheap – although not as good value as some other gyms (Nick – yours is better value).

And we've only signed up for the gym. All other stuff - pool, squash (as if – I looked like a beetroot after my one and only squash game when I was 17), tennis, football, trampolining, etc – is extra.

And they had the nerve to tell me I got a free gift, a rucksack nonetheless. I am thinking of involving Trading Standards. Since when does a gym bag or gym sack (terminology acquired from Argos website) constitute a rucksack? This insult they've given me has no substance and is not a rucksack.

Rucksack : noun a bag with two shoulder straps which allow it to be carried on the back, used by hikers

This thing has string not straps and would not be used by quality hikers. It's the kind of bag into which a small child would put plimsolls (do small children still have plimsolls?)

Do you think I have a case or am I, to quote my son, "barking bonkers?"

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