Sunday, 14 January 2007

Not an ex-friend

For the last few months I've been thinking that a friend hasn't been in touch because of something I said or did.

I've stayed in touch but it has been one way. I had come to the conclusion that whatever I'd done was so vile that I'd never hear from this friend again. I thought I'd once again become an ex-friend.

Well yesterday I sent an e-mail that resulted in a response. And I'm not mad and bad and unworthy of friendship (except in the view of Nemone and a few others).

This is good on a couple of fronts, bad on another couple.

Firstly, I'm not still unwittingly being the evil, nasty person that I thought I must have become (or had always been maybe).

Secondly, it was worth staying in touch and persisting because we're now back in touch, although I am basing this on one e-mail response.

However, flipping the coin – the reason they've not been in touch is because life's not been great and they're really down.

And also, because they're feeling low, they're not likely to be in touch much because it's difficult to do anything when life's just uphill all the way.

So there's a dilemma. I want to be supportive, but I want to give them time and space. I want to keep in touch, but then I don't want to overdo it and become another problem.

Friendships are tricky sometimes.

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