Lost

I can't remember when it happened, and I can't remember where. But at some point in the last few years I lost my binoculars.

I don't need binoculars. But I have got a pair, and sometimes I want to know where they are.

And in the last few years, whenever I've tried to find them, they haven't been there, or here, or under the bed, or in the loft, or in the tallboy, or in the dresser, or anywhere.

And every time I can't find them it drives me mad. I think primarily because I keep looking in the same places and not finding them.

I'm now thinking I've lent them to someone. And forgotten who. And that drives me mad because I keep doing that too - lending people stuff and forgetting about it.

I know Andy Dougherty has got a book of mine, has had for the last five years. I mentioned it to him a couple of years ago and he said "Do you need it?" and I had to say "No." Because I don't need it, but I would like to read it. But want and need are very different and maybe his need is greater, so he still has it.

Anyway, the point is I want my binoculars. So if anyone out there has any psychic powers, please point me in the right direction.

Oh and for the smart alecks out there I don't need to be told "It's in the last place you'll look." or asked "Do you remember when you had it last?"